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TRUE PORN
edited by Kelli Nelson and Robyn Chapman
($14.95,
http://www.trueporncomic.com)
Review by Robert Young
Highlights and lowlights of the latest comics sexthology.
“What She Said While I was Giving Head” by Sean Bieri: Over just nine panels (all of which Bieri spends off-panel, his head buried twixt a pair of thighs) Bieri shows his lover during the same act going from quizzical, to giddy, to demanding, distracted, ecstatic, whiny, complimentary, sarcastic, and finally frustrated. It’s a fine comics page, and on a personal level Bieri gets kudos for his persistence in the face (or lap) of his cunnilingual dealings with this bipolar (melo)drama queen.
Hans Rickheit turns in a well-conceived one-pager on the joys of self-fellating that might make Joe Matt blush; even as it makes Jeff Beck proud. I’ll only say that my back hurts too, Hans. Only for different reasons.
“Deposit” by Vanessa Davis: In a book chock full of brutally frank, often embarrassing revelations, “Deposit” runs neck and neck with Hans Rickheit (never a mean feat) and comes complete with a wonderfully dry and funny punch line.
“Perfect” by Laurenn McCubbin: I got little or nothing from highly-touted McCubbin’s story which was simultaneously pretentious and vapid. The art, seemingly owing a debt to former fashion artist Patrick Nagel (Duran Duran’s
Rio cover art), would have looked cold and dated by the late '80s.
Josh Simmons does a star-turn in perhaps the book’s strongest piece, “God Bless Mississippi!”. It stands as the best work yet seen from Simmons who steps away from his usual dizzyingly crosshatched style for something with a lot more clarity and charm. It’s also surely the sweetest story ever to end in a facial. What’s most impressive here is how easily Simmons utilizes a variety of techniques to tell his five-page story. For a sex scene in the back of a pickup with a camper shell, Simmons gives the reader an x-ray view from overhead in which to see the action taking place inside. For a digression on the nasty Cadbury Cream candies Simmons admits to loving (Simmons’ partner makes the sickeningly sweet confections considerably more appealing when she offers that they be eaten out of her pussy), he shifts from cartoon realism to a wildly raw underground style that perfectly illustrates the anecdote. And finally for another dalliance in the truck he delicately outlines his figures with white lines on an all-black background showing impressive facility in the process. Really the only minor drawback of Simmons' story is that it wasn’t scanned very well resulting in a slight muddiness and a lack of true black.
Finally FC Brandt delivers the most unintentionally funny story of the anthology with “The Bush of Two Birds in My Hand”. I actually had the pleasure of overhearing a very boisterous and amusing reading of Brandt’s piece in the hotel lobby at SPX 2003, as performed by frequent Brandt collaborator Jesse Reklaw (Brandt was sitting on the arm of Reklaw’s chair as his friend playfully mocked him). In
True Porn, I’m not certain whether Brandt’s intention was to show himself as the world’s most gentle and enlightened lover, or if, unsure about the content of the rest of the book’s stories, he didn’t want to risk possibly offending the sensibilities of the two female editors. Either way, for a supposed autobio sex tale, the dialogue Brandt gives himself and his two female cohorts is hilariously innocuous, and seemingly unironic. One of the women says to Brandt “You must really like women, Chris. Something in your touch and how you behave. You seem really sensitive to our needs” (sounds like Brandt’s angling for more threesomes with potential readers of
True Porn). And later Brandt’s character says “Careful Rachel. There’s semen there. Let me get a towel.” I half expected an uppercrust butler to appear and exclaim indignantly “You got chocolate in my peanut butter!” Or at the very least for Brandt to ask “May I kindly insert my naughty bit into your inviting place, milady?” None of this is to say that I didn’t enjoy Brandt’s story. Certainly he gets points for making sex (threesomes even) look positively healthy and wholesome. Kind of like
Leave It To Beaver...with a moneyshot.
With
True Porn, editors Robyn Chapman and Kelli Nelson not only deliver very entertaining forewords, but also one of 2003’s most enjoyable anthologies. So what if the subject matter alone gave them a big leg up on the competition.
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